The Ghost of Christmas Goth
by bluebird24
Summary: After helping Peyton find true herself again, the Ghost of Christmas Goth now must help Peyton realize her true feelings. A Peyton story loosely based on the story A Christmas Carol. An LP story. COMPLETED
1. Chapter 1

A/N: pretty much everything on the show has happened...including LB getting together. (Don't worry, it won't last long). This chapter basically sets up the background of the story. I don't think they story will be very long...less then 10. If there are any questions, just ask. Hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything OTH related.**

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**Chapter 1**

A small match lit the crumpled paper that was strategically placed under the firewood. Slowly, the flames spread up to the lumber where sparks began to flicker on the cold wood. The slight dampness on the firewood also made it hard for flames to immediately roar into a moderate fire, but the sparks refused to go away.

With a little patience and some prodding with a metal poker, the sparks turned into small flames. And soon the wood began to crack, giving into the intensely growing flames.

"There," Peyton said as she put the poker back into its stand, "Oh, don't forget to open the flue and then put the gate back on," she whispered in a low voice so that they wouldn't wake Ellie who was taking an afternoon nap in her bedroom.

She held her hands out to the flames, warming them up. She and Lucas returned early from the slopes, as neither one of them were skiers, leaving Nathan, Haley and Rachel on the slopes.

They sat down, each with a cup of cocoa, in front of the fireplace of Ellie's chalet. Since her father was still at sea, Peyton had decided to spend part of her Christmas Holidays with Ellie at her cabin. Nobody really knew how much longer Ellie had to live but what they did know was that they were going to make the best of the time they had left together. So after making mends, Peyton wanted to spend as much time as she could with her. Ellie was more than thankful for Peyton's decision, but also felt bad for taking Peyton away from her friends over the holidays. So Ellie asked Peyton to invite her friends to join them for the weekend.

"Well, that seemed easy," Lucas commented as he sat down beside her.

"Yeah…been doing it for years. My dad taught me how when I was like 12," Peyton laughed, "I love sitting by the fire during the holidays…you know, just watching it dance and listening to the log crack…anyways, I tried to start one on my own and forgot to open the flue…the whole living room started to fill with smoke. By the time the fire alarm went off, it was like this black fog took over the house…the whole house reeked of smoke for weeks…my clothes, the furniture, everything. So, my dad thought, 'well, either I scold her and she'll burn the house down, or I'll teach her…and save the house',"

Lucas chuckled at her story but it quickly faded when he caught sight of her. The fire reflecting in her eyes had her mesmerized. The dancing light seemed to make her glow in a way he had once forgotten…it had rekindled something inside him.

When she turned to face him, she recognized the look in his eyes. It sent a shiver down her spine. "Um…so, Brooke," Peyton uneasily reminded them.

Although Brooke didn't join the gang that week, she was never easily forgotten, especially when it came to Lucas and Peyton.

Lucas chuckled to himself. He shook his head, trying to shake the feeling, "Yeah…did she say anything to you?"

"Sorry. You know, it's probably nothing. She's just got a lot on her plate right now and she's not thinking straight…I mean how many times has Brooke Davis pass up a weekend of fun?"

"Yeah, maybe," Lucas nodded his head. "But it was just so sudden…I mean everything was fine between us…"

"Well, hey, you guys aren't actually broken up are you?"

* * *

**Flashback**

"_What do you mean you're not coming?" Lucas stared at Brooke in disbelief, waiting for an answer. _

"_I…I still have a lot of work to do with…student's council stuff, college applications, SATs…"_

"_Brooke, it's Christmas break," Lucas laughed, "I'm sure the school won't mind if you spend one weekend at the cottage with me and our friends,"_

"_What about the clothing line? I can't just slack off on that either,"_

"_Why are you making all these excuses, Brooke? Come on, I know you love spreading the Christmas spirit…" he stepped closer to her, "So, why don't you just come with us and if you don't feel like skiing or having fun," he said in a joking tone, "then I'll sit right beside you by the fireplace while you work on your designs," _

_Brooke thought about it for a second, having second thoughts about her decision, "The fireplace?" _

_Lucas shrugged, "Or wherever…Peyton just told me that the fireplace is amazing, so I was just trying to picture it,"_

_She looked down at her hands for second before she shook her head, "You were right," Brooke whispered distantly. _

"_Look, this is important to Peyton and after everything she's been going through, being around people who love and care about her will cheer her up. So come on," Lucas smiled. _

_Brooke let out a small bitter laugh. _

"_What?" he questioned. _

_She sighed, "Nothing…look," Brooke looked down for a second while she fidgeted with her hands. Tears began to well in her eyes, "I think we should use this weekend as time apart,"_

**End Flashback

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**

Lucas hadn't told anyone the reason why Brooke didn't come to the cabin with them. He just told him that she had a lot of work to do with the fashion line. But honestly, Lucas didn't know the answer to that question. All Brooke asked for was for time apart. Was that 'broken up'?

"Actually, I think we are,"

Peyton's eyes widened in shock.

"Yeah, that was my reaction too," he chuckled.

"Lucas, I had no idea…When? Why?" Peyton was astonished.

"This morning and I'm not sure why," Lucas sighed. "All she said that we should spend this weekend apart. I don't get it though. I mean she was looking forward to this weekend for weeks and then all of a sudden…are you sure she didn't say anything to you?"

Peyton shook her head apologetically and then admitted, "Brooke and I haven't really talked much lately…it's just been hard trying to talk to Brooke, you know…"

"What do you mean?"

Peyton shrugged. Never once did she try to admit it, but she knew things would never be the same between her and Brooke. Their friendship had changed since the triangle of love formed between the three of them. Although they were trying, something didn't feel right. Peyton felt like she couldn't talk to Brooke anymore and that Brooke had changed…or maybe it was Peyton who changed...or maybe it was because of Lucas.

After letting out a sigh, she decided not to get into details with Lucas, "I don't know…I just think she hasn't forgiven me yet for quitting the cheerleading squad," she joked.

"Yeah, she was pretty pissed," he laughed before becoming serious, "but you quit for good reason. You don't regret it do you?"

"No. Ellie doesn't have much time left…" Peyton said softly, "and I want to spend as much time with her as I can…what about you? Do you regret not telling everyone the real reason why you quit the basketball team?"

A few weeks after Peyton had surprisingly quit the squad, Lucas made another shocking decision by quitting the basketball team. For weeks his ex-teammates and fellow classmates gave him a hard time about it and assumed it was because he couldn't hack it on the court or that he would never be as good as his brother. But nobody knew it was because he had HCM, not even Brooke. It had been a hard time for Lucas, but he got through it with the help of Haley, Nathan and Peyton, who were the only ones who knew of his condition.

"No…I don't want anyone's pity. I just want to be treated as a normal guy,"

"You know, I'm glad you told me about your HCM," she said sincerely.

Lucas nodded, "I needed someone who I could talk to about it. I mean Haley is great, but she nags me just as much as my mom does…Nathan's just as bad," he laughed.

A sudden feeling of queasiness came over Peyton. She squeezed her eyes tight and held her head with her hand, hoping that it would pass quickly.

"Peyt…are you ok?"

With her eyes still shut, "Yeah, just um…give me a second,"

With concerned he gently placed a hand on her back and stroked her, trying to soothe her. With his other hand he placed it on her forehead. "You feel really warm," he said worriedly.

"Lucas, I'm not feeling that good," she admitted.

"You should lie down. Come on, I'll help you to your room,"

"No, I'll be fine. It'll pass," she stubbornly refused, "Anyways it's almost time for Ellie's medication…"

"I'll take care of it," he said firmly. "After we get you in bed, I'll give Ellie her medication,"

Before Peyton could say anything again, Lucas pointed out, "Look, if you're sick, then it's probably not a good idea to go near Ellie…and the faster you rest, the better you'll feel,"

After thinking about it for a moment, Peyton finally gave in and let Lucas help her up to her room.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Thanks for the reviews! I hope this chapter turned out for you guys and that I don't confuse you. Keep in mind that this fic is lossely based on _A Christmas Carol_. The 'flashbacks' are in italics. Let me know how what you think!

Dislaimer; I don't own anything OTH related.

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**Chapter 2**

Sleep was troubling to find for Peyton Sawyer. Not only was she in an unfamiliar bed but her temperature was also at 100 degrees and seemed to be climbing. Her body tossed and turned until she at least found a comfortable spot. With her eyes gently shut, she finally gave up and let sleep take over her overheated and exhausted body…that was until she heard someone eating rather loudly on something crunchy.

Her eyes flew open and she looked up. "What did I do now?" groaned Peyton.

Through a mouthful of a gingerbread man cookie, the girl replied, "Oh, I think we both know that you know,"

Although they still conversed nightly in her head, she hadn't seen her alter ego since she had made peace with Ellie months earlier. Since then, Peyton's life seemed to get easier; she brooded less and had a better relationship with her father and more importantly stopped pushing people away, or so she thought.

Peyton propped herself up on her elbow on the bed to converse with her 'ghost of Christmas Goth', "I'm sick," she complained, "Can't you spread a little Yule tide cheer here and let me rest?"

She dusted off the fallen cookie crumbs off of her as she spoke, "Oh, I could…but that wouldn't be any fun, now would it? Besides, are you really sick?"

Peyton thought for a second. Mysteriously, she did feel fine now. Her temperature was gone and she no longer felt nauseous. "Why are you here? It's almost Christmas and I have been so good lately,"

The black and silver haired angel smirked before she broke out in an over dramatic and over cheery song and dance, "Oh, Santa can you hear me? I have been so good this year. And all I want is one thing: Tell me my true love…"

"OK, Stop. You are seriously starting to annoy me,"

"No, keep going. I like that song," another voice cheerily said.

Peyton's mouth dropped as she looked across the other side of the room. There by the window was another version herself. Only this one was dressed in a white angel outfit and had shoulder length curly blonde hair.

"Oh, look it's the ghost of Christmas Goody Two Shoes," the black angel sarcastically introduced her.

"OK, I am clearly going insane," remarked the real Peyton.

"Relax, she's the good part of you," explained the gothic angel. "Didn't think you had one now did you?" She added with a smart-ass smirk.

Peyton looked back at the white angel, who was smiling happily. "Hi," she waved excitedly. Her smile was big and never seemed to leave her face.

Peyton raised her eyebrows, slightly taken aback by the cheeriness. She then thanked herself for suppressing that part of herself.

"No wonder you don't let her out too often," the black angel agreed, "Well, anyways, that's my cue to leave,"

"Wait," Peyton wondered what was going on.

"Oh, don't worry," winked the black angel, "I have a feeling I'll be back," she said before she disappeared.

Peyton's eyes shifted to the white angel, who held her hand out.

"No, no, no…seeing you is…. more then I can handle right now. I am not leaving this bed,"

"That's ok. You don't have to leave your bed, yet,"

Peyton watched as her good conscience walked over to the television stand across the room. From her pocket she pulled out a circular disc, opened up the DVD player and placed the disc in. After closing the slot, she picked up the television remote that was resting on the stand and sat down on the bed, careful not to bend her wings. Peyton eyed the girl who was now sitting beside her in disbelief.

"So…we're just gonna sit her an watch a movie?" Peyton asked.

"Something like that," she responded with a giggle.

Peyton rolled her eyes. She let out a frustrated sigh as she leaned against the headboard. "Why couldn't my dad just send me to a shrink?" she thought. It was strange enough that she saw her dark conscience but now she was sitting right beside her good conscience.

"Now, pay close attention,"

Peyton raised an eyebrow, "What exactly are we watching?"

"Just watch, it's good," she whispered excitedly.

Reluctantly Peyton stared at the screen. The black screen began to flicker to life. A black and white count down suddenly appeared as if it was signaling for a movie to begin.

A kitchen suddenly appeared on the screen. There was something familiar about the kitchen that made Peyton wonder. It looked liked the kitchen in Karen's Café. She shrugged it off and figured it must be some coincidence that the show they were watching had the same exact tiles, the same colours and even the same oven. Peyton's eyes suddenly grew wider when she spotted the girl standing against the refrigerator.

Peyton leaned forward, trying to get a better look. The girl was dressed casually in a pair of dark blue jeans and a black t-shirt with a red circle printed on the front. Within the red circle read 'Dashboard Confessional'. The hair on the girl had curly blonde locks that fell just past her shoulders.

"Wait a second…th…that's me.?" Peyton exclaimed, "What the hell is going on?" Peyton demanded to know as she was beginning to freak out.

"We're revisiting the past…our past," her good conscience said sweetly.

"What do you mean we're revisiting the past…and exactly how am I on TV?"

"You know that story by Charles Dickens…_A Christmas Carol_?"

"Yeah," Peyton said slowly. "Scrooge gets visited by three ghosts and they show him his past, present and future…"

"Well…that's what we're going to do…only we're not ghosts…" she smiled happily.

"No," she shook her head in disbelief, "This is not happening. I don't need…"

"Shhh…watch," the angel interrupted as she turned her attention back to the TV. "You can't miss this," she said excitedly.

* * *

_Peyton smiled when Lucas entered the kitchen. With a smile of his own he made his way over to the fridge. _

"_The last customer has left the building…" Lucas announced. _

_Her arms reached out and wrapped themselves around his neck, "We have the whole place to ourselves…what are we going to do?"_

_Lucas shrugged his shoulders, pretending to think, "Well…I guess we could clean up the kitchen for my mom…"_

_She gently pushed him away and playfully agreed, "That sounds like a good idea,"_

"_Or," Lucas quickly grabbed her around the waist before she could get away, "we could dance,"_

"_Dance?" Peyton was surprised, "Lucas Scott knows how to dance?"_

_Lucas smiled and stepped back. He pressed play on the kitchen stereo and the CD began to whirl. Then, standing in front of her he put one hand behind his back and held his other hand for her. He bowed, like a gentleman courting a fair lady, while keeping his eyes fixed on hers, "Care to dance?" _

_Peyton blushed as she accepted. She placed her hand in his extended hand. Lucas stood up straight and wrapped his arms around her slender waist, holding her close. Her arms embraced him around his neck. She looked up into his eyes as they swayed gently along with the beat of the music.

* * *

_

As Peyton watched herself and Lucas dance on the screen, she noticed how content both of them were. They were both relaxed and were completely in a pure bliss. She continued to watch her past self rest her head against his shoulder while Lucas closed his eyes and placed a kiss on her head before resting his against her head. Simultaneously, they both let a small content smile form on their lips.

"Aww…we were so happy there," the white angel sighed.

"We were also sneaking around," Peyton reminded herself.

Peyton had remembered exactly what had happened before she and Lucas spent the evening hidden away in the kitchen of the café. It happened last year and they were in the kitchen because at the time, Lucas was dating Brooke for the first time. He was supposed to take Brooke out that night, but Lucas didn't want to spend time with Brooke. He wanted to spend time with Peyton.

So Lucas called Brooke and told her that he had to close up the café that night for his mom. Brooke pouted for a bit, but then asked him if he would meet her at a party afterwards. Although he had agreed, he never made it. He spent the entire night dancing with Peyton.

"Yeah…that was unfortunate…for Brooke but don't you remember exactly how it felt to be with him…the way he looked at us…"

Peyton shook her head, refusing to admit that she remembered those feelings. It had been a long time ago. Those feelings didn't exist anymore. Lucas is with Brooke and Brooke is happy now. Bringing up her past feelings for Lucas wasn't going to help anyone.

"No, I'm not going to do this anymore. Lucas and I are over. There's nothing there anymore. We're just friends,"

For the first time that night, the happy angel gave Peyton a sad look. "Are you sure about that?" She looked back at the TV and pressed the fast forward button on the remote.

The screen showed a lone car traveling down a dark and empty stretch of highway. It was nighttime as the dark sky was littered with twinkling stars. As the TV began to focus on the car, Peyton recognized her black Mercury Comet Caliente. Inside the car, were two people: she was behind the wheel and Lucas was buckled in the passenger seat.

She wasn't sure which memory this was, after all, she and Lucas had gone on many road trips that summer. It wasn't until Peyton heard the first few beats of that classic depressing song from the 80s did she remember that it had happened a few months ago.

Peyton waited for Lucas to turn up the volume, like he did when he recognized the song.

* * *

_Lucas leaned over and turned up the volume. _

_The curly blonde behind the wheel watched him in surprise. She became even more surprised when Lucas starting singing softly along with Concrete Blonde._

Joey, baby - don't get crazy  
Detours, fences - I get defensive

_After letting out a laugh, Peyton composed herself and started sing along as well. _

And when you said I scared you  
Well I guess you scared me too  
But we got lucky once before  
And I don't want to close the door

_A huge smile formed on Lucas's face. His voice became louder and more off key. Peyton followed suit and for a while the two voices dueled until they were both singing at the top of their lungs.

* * *

_

"I loved this moment," the white angel sighed, "The two of you were so happy and the lyrics…"

Peyton herself smiled as she remembered the exact feeling she felt that night. They were both happy. For about four minutes and three seconds, nothing else in the world mattered – not Ellie, not Dan, not Brooke and not Jake. It was only the two of them, Lucas and Peyton, in her car going on a journey together that entire summer.

Having Lucas by her side meant the world to Peyton. She never felt alone, especially when he came back into her life. When she needed someone to talk to, he'd come over to listen. When she just needed some company, he'd be right there beside her. He had been there for her just as she was there for him. Whenever they needed each other, they were always there for each other that summer.

"See...we're just friends. What's the point in all this anyways?" Peyton asked with a bit of annoyance and attitude in her voice.

"To remember," the angel replied simply.

"Remember what exactly?"

"To remember what it feels like to be happy,"

"To be happy?" Peyton said disbelievingly.

The angel nodded, "Yep. Those were just some the memories where we were truly happy. And I think we both know they mostly involve Lucas,"

Peyton thought for a moment. She twisted her thumb ring around. "But I never forgot about those moments…" she admitted, "I remember these feelings everyday," Peyton felt that pang of hurt in her heart again. It began to anger her, "and you know what? I don't want to feel them anymore. I wish they would just go away,"

"And why's that?" she asked gently, trying to push Peyton to free her feelings.

She took a deep breath, "Because…because every time I remember these stupid moments or…even see him…see him with Brooke…it hurts so damn much," her voice cracked. "I thought I had moved on…that I was over him, but I'm not. I can't let him go,"

"Why don't you tell him?"

Peyton let out a bitter laugh, "Oh yeah, that's what I'm going to do,"

"Well, why not?"

"Umm…because of Brooke...because of what happened last time," her voice became a sad whisper when she said, "Because he loves Brooke,"

"Oh boo hoo, so he loves her," the familiar voice didn't belong to her good conscience. Peyton looked up to see that her dark side had returned, "But that doesn't mean he's _in love_ with her,"

The dark angel looked at the white angel, "You had your turn…now it's my turn to get rid of our self doubt,"

The white angel smiled at Peyton. As she began to disappear, she whispered a quote, "You can close your eyes to the things you don't want to see but you cannot close your heart to things you don't want to feel,"

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**A/N:** I don't remember where I found the last quote I used, but when I find out who said it, I'll put it up. 


	3. Chapter 3

This chapter was rushed a bit. I'm not totally satisfied with it and may make minor changes (nothing plot wise, but scene wise) later but I just want to get this up b/c I'd like to have the Christmas chapter up on Christmas…if you have any suggestions or thoughts, let me know! 

Disclaimer: I don't own anything OTH related. Transcripts were taken from twiztv.

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**Chapter 3**

"Alright, so what's going on with Tiny Tim now?" Peyton asked sarcastically.

Her dark self, stopped braiding her long black hair and threw her a questioning look, "Since when did we like Tim Smith?"

"Oh gross…I mean Tiny Tim…_A Christmas Story_…you know, Scrooge gets visited by the Ghost of Christmas Past, Present and Future…"

"Oh yeah, I know that story," The dark angel continued to braid her hair.

"So…" Peyton said, getting frustrated with the lack of answers.

"So…what?"

"So, my good side took me down memory lane…aren't you supposed to show me the present…like what I'm doing right now?"

"Well…right now you're walking and talking to me,"

Peyton rolled her eyes. Talking to herself was not only impossible but frustrating as well. "You know, I'd like to get some sleep tonight, so if you wouldn't mind…"

"Alright, fine," she picked up the remote and pressed play.

Peyton began to blush as she watched herself, in a black cocktail dress, and Lucas kiss passionately. Hastily, she removed his jacket as their passion escalated.

* * *

"_Don't need this…" Peyton said as she removed his jacket. "mmm, or this," she continued as she removed his tie, leaving kisses along the way.

* * *

_

"Wait…this already happened. Why are we still watching the past?" Peyton asked.

"Because some**one** can't seem to let go of the past," the dark angel replied smugly.

* * *

_Lucas: I've wanted this for so long._

_Peyton: Me too. And now we can have it._

_Lucas: No, no, no. I don't mean just that. I want this._

_Lucas puts his hand over her heart._

_Lucas: You know? I want to be here. I want to have everything with you. I want it all. I want us, Peyton._

_Peyton backs away, leaving a confused Lucas._

_Lucas: Hey, what's wrong?_

_Peyton: This isn't supposed to be that._

_Lucas: Peyton-_

_Peyton: Why couldn't you just leave it alone?

* * *

_

As she watched herself walk out of the Scott's bedroom, Peyton couldn't help be wonder what would have happened had she stayed that night: would she still be with Lucas? Would she be happy? Would she still have this nagging feeling of regret for walking away?

Peyton sighed as Lucas's porch steps suddenly came on the screen. There sitting on the top steps were her past self and Lucas who had his left arm in a sling.

* * *

_LUCAS: Peyton…_

_PEYTON: When I saw you lying there in the hospital right after the accident all I could think about was how my mom wasn't was luck as you. And then I remembered, after she died, it was Brooke who was there for me. We were just little kids and she would come over, every single day, to make sure I was okay. She's been my best friend ever since._

_LUCAS: Well life's short, Peyton._

_PEYTON: Too short to live it as a bad person. I can't betray her, Lucas._

_LUCAS: You mean even more than we already have._

_Peyton stood up, getting ready to leave. She knew if she didn't leave right that second, his sad, pleading eyes would have been enough to change her mind. _

_LUCAS: Peyton. I'm sorry._

_PEYTON: Me too. But it's better this way, right?_

_LUCAS: Yeah. _

_As Peyton walked away from the house and Lucas, tears began to fall. She paused halfway down the walkway. Her heart told her to turn around and to go back to Lucas, but her mind told her that this was for the best.

* * *

_

"Are you noticing a trend here?" the gothic ghost asked.

Peyton bit her lip. She noticed it alright. Whenever they had chance to be together, it was always Peyton who walked away. She was the one who pushed him away. But then, she thought, he could have easily gone after her if he wanted to.

"Oh he wanted to come after us…Lucas wants to be with **us**," the goth girl read her mind. "Why else do you think he keeps coming back into our life? But more importantly, why do we keep running from him?"

Peyton looked away. Her head filled with the same questions, thoughts and doubts. All her life she pushed people away, never letting anyone get to know the real Peyton or never wanting to get to know them. It was her nature – to protect herself from getting hurt when they would eventually leave her. But Lucas was different. Time and time again, no matter how hard she pushed, he was always there pushing his way right back into her life.

So then why did she run from him? It wasn't that she was unsure of her feelings for Lucas because deep down she knew exactly where her heart was. Maybe that was what really scared her. To be so young and to fall in love so hard, so fast was not just scary, but confusing. How could someone, who you barely know, just get you the way he did? How could he see through her façade when no one else could?

"So you finally admitting it?" The gothic angel interrupted her thoughts.

"Admitting what?"

"That you're madly in love with Lucas Scott,"

"I'm not," she denied, "Besides, even if I was, it doesn't change the fact that he's with Brooke,"

"So? Look, don't tell me that you're not gonna go after Lucas because you can't betray Brooke…cause honey, if you did and you should, you'd make everyone's life a hell of a lot better,"

Peyton shook her head, "I'm not doing that to Brooke again,"

Her gothic conscience rolled her eyes, "You're a much better friend then B. Davis deserves you know…I mean if she was a friend then she would have been there for us when we were missing dad or even dealing with Rick…or what about when we needed someone to talk to about Elle? Where was she when we needed help finding Ellie's bracelet…does she even know about it?"

"She was busy," Peyton tried to believe.

She shook her head in disbelief, "You know, you told Lucas that to be a better person it's not about what you say, it's about what you do…what exactly has Brooke done?"

"She's got enough to worry about now…she doesn't need to carry my weight too,"

"Would you stop making excuses for her? It's getting real tiresome. If she's the best friend that you claim her to be, then she'd make time for you. She'd know about all the shit you've been dealing with the past year,"

The girl dressed in black took a calming breath before continuing, "Besides, Lucas was busy too, but he still found time for you. In fact…didn't he have plans with Brooke the night he found you crying in your room trying to find the bracelet? Not only did he find the bracelet for us, but he bailed on Brooke," the smug girl crossed her arms as she made her point. A smile then broke out on her face as she remembered something else, "Oooh…what about the road trip to find Ellie? Wasn't he supposed to help Brooke with her clothing line or something?"

"Well, if Brooke is such a bad friend, then what kind of a friend would I be if I stole Lucas away from her, again?" Peyton debated.

The black-winged angel thought for a second, "Well, first of all you wouldn't be stealing him…he'd come willingly," she said confidently, "Secondly, if Brooke is such a good friend, then why won't she let us be happy?"

Peyton shook her head, "Her being with Lucas has nothing to do with me. If Lucas wanted to be with me then why is with Brooke?"

"He's not with Brooke right now," she reminded Peyton that Brooke had stayed back in Tree Hill that weekend. Then she shrugged her shoulders, "Look, I can't read his mind like I can yours, but maybe it's because being with Brooke is easier. No matter how many mistakes she makes or how many guys she kisses or sleeps with, he knows she'll never truly break his heart,"

"See…he does love her,"

The dark conscience shook her head, "For someone who's doing the same thing, you sure don't get it,"

"And what exactly would that be?"

"Hiding…You can't have your heart broken if you're not with the one you truly love,"

Peyton bit her lip and looked at her goth self from the corner of her eye.

"Clearly, I'm not getting though to you…I can show you how Lucas has always been there for us or how he looks at us still or how he's our first call and we're his. But you still deny it," she got up off the bed, "Maybe you need to hear it from someone else…and I hope you do before we lose him for good,"


	4. Chapter 4

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday and got everything they wished for...I'm still waiting for a little LP loving in the future ;) Anyways thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. This one is a bit long and took me a while to get up, especially since our company left pretty late. But here it is...hope you enjoy!

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**Chapter 4 **

She continued to toss and turn, trying to get back to sleep but her mind couldn't stop wondering about everything she had seen that night. Question, doubts and curiosity clouded her mind. She was so troubled by them she had forgotten that Scrooge was visited by three ghosts- she had only seen two so far.

She let out a tired yawn as she made herself comfortable. She was tired and desperately let sleep take over her body. Peyton soon began to drift off until…

"Peyton," a soft angelic voice whispered, "Peyt, wake up honey,"

Her eyes angrily flew open and she groggily moaned. She sat up once again, expecting to face her other self, "I thought you said you were going to leave m….mom?"

The young woman across the room smiled, "Hi honey,"

Peyton ripped the covers off of her and jumped out of be. She ran across the room and into the waiting arms of her mother. They both held on tight as a few tears slipped from both eyes. Peyton took in a deep breath and took in that scent she had desperately tried to find for the past 9 years.

"It's really you, right?" questioned Peyton.

Anna smiled, "Yes,"

"Mom, I miss you so much,"

"I miss you too, Peyt,"

Peyton closed her eyes and held on to her mother tightly, never wanting to let go ever again. She could feel her mother stroking her hair.

"Your curls…" Anna cried.

Peyton laughed and touched the ends of her straightened hair, "I know…I miss them too,"

Anna laughed. "You're still beautiful. You've really grown up," she said as she took another look at her daughter. Then she gave her daughter another hug before reluctantly pulling away, "I know you have a lot of questions, but we don't have much time,"

Peyton nodded sadly, "What is it?"

"Come on," she took her daughter by her hand, "I have to show you something,"

They made their way down the stairs. As they drew closer, Peyton heard the sounds of laughter and running children screaming. She looked at her mother questioningly who continued down the stairs. When Peyton went to sleep that night at Ellie's cottage, she was there with Ellie, Lucas, Haley, Nathan and Rachel.

The sounds of little footsteps neared them and snapped her out of thought. Suddenly, a small little boy, about seven in age appeared from around the corner and scampered up the stairs. Peyton paused as another child, a brunette girl, came chasing after the first boy. Standing in their way, Peyton tried to move out of their way but she was too late. She closed her eyes, anticipating an impact but strangely, she felt nothing.

Her eye peeked open, just in time to see the little girl run right through her. Frozen in place, Peyton began to process what had just happened. Two strange kids had appeared from nowhere and were now running through her.

"Am I dead?" Peyton wondered.

Anna let out a laugh, "No. They just can't see you. Come on, I'll explain,"

As they made their way down the rest of the stairs and to the living room of Ellie's cottage, Anna filled her daughter in, "Ellie left the cottage to you after she passed on. And every Christmas you get everyone together here. This is a part of your future, Peyton. You can see everyone here, but nobody can see you…"

It was strange, but Peyton after the night she had, she understood.

The living room was decorated with Christmas stocking and lights. A decorated Christmas tree stood in the corner by a large window. Carefully wrapped presents were placed neatly under the tree. People were also scattered through out the room, talking and laughing.

Peyton took a closer look at the people in the room. Although they did look older, she could still recognize them. She saw Haley standing beside Nathan who was holding a toddler.

"That's Tyler, he's Nathan and Haley's. Oh and those two kids we saw earlier, Jacob and Mackenzie, are also theirs. And over there are Rachel, Mouth and Skills. Over by the food table are Junk and Fergie,"

"Wait, you know all my friends?"

Anna smiled and nodded. She didn't have to say it aloud but Peyton knew that Anna had been watching over her. A part of Peyton felt good, knowing that her mother had always been with her, but a part of her also cringed at the thought of knowing that her mother knew of something things that she had done.

"There's Jake and Jenny," Anna pointed out by the tree.

Peyton looked and saw a brunette standing closely beside Jake. As the girl turned around Peyton saw a bump around her midsection. She smiled happily for her friend who lovingly put his arm around the girl.

"That's Lauren," Anna introduced Jake's wife, "They got married two years ago and are expecting their first child together in three months,"

"And there, on the couch, is your father," Anna smiled brightly as she stared at her husband.

Larry now had grey hair and had aged quite a bit, but none the less, he looked happy. As Peyton got a better look at her father, who was sitting with Karen and Keith, she noticed that he was holding a baby.

The surprised look on Peyton's face made Anna laugh. "That's Samantha…Nathan and Haley's newborn.

"Oh," Peyton uttered, somewhat disappointed.

"You're father was good with kids, teenagers, on the other hand…" Anna joked.

Peyton continued to scan the large room. She stopped suddenly when she noticed the curly blonde hair of the woman standing in front of the fireplace. It was her, standing next to a dark haired man Peyton didn't recognize.

"That's Barry," Anna said.

Although he was an attractive man, he just didn't seem like Peyton's type. His demeanor seemed to give off a stuck up, high-roller vibe.

"Another one of Brooke's set up," whispered Anna.

Peyton rolled her eyes. Then curiously walked towards the two to listen to their conversation.

* * *

"_That painting is hideous," Barry commented at the painting hanging over the mantel. _

_Peyton gave him a dirty look and then drank the rest of her wine as if it were a shot of vodka. She then looked up at the painting and sighed. It was her favorite piece of work – the sun hanging over the horizon. The rich colours of the reds and oranges blended perfectly, the way nature had intended it to be and the way she remembered seeing it on the beach that day. _

"_I think it's a work of art," said a voice from behind. _

_Peyton's stomach fluttered when she heard the voice. She and Barry turned around to see Lucas looking up at the painting. She shyly smiled as their eyes met for a brief moment. _

"_Oh yeah?" Barry huffed, "What's so great about it?" _

"_Well, just look at the colours. They mix so perfectly and it's as if you're on the beach, watching the sun set…but at the same time, it's not just a sun setting over the ocean," Lucas explained his thoughts, "It's more than that…I mean as the sun sets, it's not just the end of the day…it's the end of a summer –I think the sunset is symbolic for a fading summer," _

_Barry thought for a moment, "Well how do you know it's not a sunrise?" _

_Lucas shrugged, "That's the beauty of art…it means something different to everyone," _

_Barry looked back up at the painting. He mumbled something but neither Lucas nor Peyton heard. Lucas's eyes were fixed on her as she mouthed, "Thank you," _

_A smile formed on his face as he nodded, "Where'd you find the painting? I really love it," _

_Peyton began to blush and was about to answer when they heard Brooke calling his name. _

_Peyton watched on disappointedly as she watched Brooke briskly usher Lucas away to the other side of the room. She then turned her attention back just in time to see her future self pick up her jacket and head outside with a full glass of wine. Meanwhile, Barry remained standing in front of the painting alone.

* * *

_

"Peyton,"

The invisible blonde looked up to see her mother standing next to Brooke and Lucas. She was waving her daughter over.

* * *

_Lucas and Brooke were standing off to the side of the room, having what appeared to be an argument. Their voices, however, were kept in a whisper so not to disrupted everyone else's Christmas spirits. _

"_Well why do you keep setting her up with these losers?" Lucas asked in a hushed tone. _

"_They're not losers…they're rich," _

"_So? Not everything is about money, Brooke. Peyton doesn't care about money. Peyton deserves someone who will treat her with respect and just…just love her," _

"_Yeah, so I noticed," _

"_What's that supposed to mean?" _

"_Every time I turn around, there she is with you. All she has to do is break a nail and there you are, right beside her," _

"_You're being ridiculous," he hissed._

"_You know, it's been like this since high school. But it's going to stop now. WE," Brooke pointed to Lucas and then to herself, "are married. You are supposed to be there for me," _

"_I am there for you Brooke…Every time YOU break a nail, I'm on the phone with the beauty salon…" Lucas sarcastically said. _

_Brooke glared at him, "I don't even know why I agreed to marry you," She then turned and walked away from him. _

"_I don't even know why I asked," Lucas yelled after her as everyone else in the room stopped their conversations and stared at Lucas. But no one seemed to be surprised, however. Lucas and Brooke having arguments was nothing new to them.

* * *

_

"It's time to go," Anna said as she began to lead Peyton back towards the stairs.

Peyton sighed as she followed. She took one last look around the room. Everyone seemed to be happy; Nathan and Haley were back together and had a small family to prove it; Jake had found someone who loved him and Jenny; even Rachel, Fergie, Skills and Mouth were content with their respective dates. But there were three who didn't have a have a bright future in store.

Peyton looked out the front window and saw her future self standing outside alone. Her back was to the house but there wasn't any doubt in Peyton's mind that some tears were shed that night. Then there was Brooke, who had left the room, angry at her husband who was never really there for her - the same husband who was now standing by the large front window and was captivated by something outside.

Peyton bit her lip and was about to follow her mother up the stairs when she noticed something…or rather someone. Standing in the middle of the room was Brooke. Not the future Brooke, who was no longer in the room, but a Brooke who was dressed in pink pajamas and looked very much like the high school Brooke from the present. Peyton couldn't believe her eyes.

She felt her mother nudge her arm. Peyton looked up at her mom. It was time to go. She took a glanced back to where she had seen her brunette friend but she was nowhere to be seen. Peyton shook her head. It wasn't possible…was it?

* * *

"Well that didn't seem so bad," Peyton put on a smile as they stood outside the bedroom door.

Her mother cocked an eyebrow and in a stern voice said, "I know that smile Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer. You can't hide everything…especially from your mother,"

Peyton shifted uncomfortably in her place, like a small child who was being scolded, "I just don't know what to do, mom. If Lucas is the one I'm supposed to be with then why is he with Brooke now and in the future?"

"Because you never told him how you really felt," Anna answered, "Ever since I left…you've never let anyone in, Peyt. You were always scared to because you were always scared that they would leave. But what you didn't realize was that there was always one who kept coming back for you,"

The confused teenager looked sullen as she listened to her mother.

"It's time to let him in, Peyton,"

Peyton looked up at her mother with tears in her eyes, "But how do I do that without hurting Brooke?"

Anna smiled at her daughter's unselfishness. That was one thing that never changed in Peyton – her always sacrificing her own happiness for others. "It won't be easy at first. Brooke is just as confused as you are. She just deals with things differently. Brooke is a good friend. She may not always show it, but you always knew she was and she'll prove it,"

A weak smile of hope formed on Peyton's face. "And Lucas…what if he doesn't feel the same? What if all he really is…is just a friend?"

Anna shrugged. There was only so much she could tell her daughter and Anna knew you couldn't force a stubborn Peyton to do anything, "Then at least you'll know…and then you can stop having these crazy conversations in your head," The mother and daughter shared a laugh.

They finally entered the room but Peyton stopped suddenly. Sitting next to the bed in a chair was a sleeping Lucas. She recognized the pajamas he was wearing.

"Are we back in the present?" Peyton asked.

"Yes," her mother smiled as she stood beside Peyton, looking at Lucas. "He's been there all night long, you know,"

"Why?"

"Why don't you ask him when you wake up?" she nudged her daughter, "Come on, let's get you to bed. I have to get going,"

The fact that her mother was only there temporarily hadn't crossed Peyton's mind. Tears began to form in her eyes. She didn't want to say goodbye to her mother. There were still so many questions and conversations Peyton wanted to have with her mom.

"What's wrong, honey?"

"I don't want you to leave me again," Peyton choked out.

Anna walked over to her teenage daughter and pulled her into a hug, "I never left you, Peyt. I've always been watching over you,"

"But it's not the same," Tears flowed down her cheeks, "It's not fair. I need you, mom,"

"Shhh…it's ok,"

"It's not ok. It was never ok…I can't do this again," she cried.

Anna looked down at Peyton. She gently wiped her tears as she softly spoke, "I know. I know it's not fair, but Peyt, honey, that's just the way it is. If I could stay, you know I would…but at least now we get to say goodbye,"

She was reluctant to agree, but Peyton did understand.

"I'm proud of you, Peyt…even though there were some decisions that had me turning in my grave…" her mother lightly hinted at Peyton's experiment with drugs.

"I'm sorry,"

"I know you are… I always knew that you were strong and would make the right choices in the end…I never doubted you. You had it tough growing up, but look at you now…so beautiful, so strong…No matter what you do, I'll always be proud of you Peyton, remember that,"

Peyton nodded, "I will, mom. I love you,"

"I love you too,"

They hugged one last time before Anna tucked Peyton into bed. She pushed the bangs out of Peyton's face like she did when Peyton was little. It was then followed by a kiss on the forehead.

"Goodnight, honey,"

"Goodnight, mom," Peyton choked out.

Anna gave one last smile. Peyton bit on her bottom lip to keep it from quivering as she watched her mom stand up.

"Wait," Peyton said as she grabbed her mom by the hand, "Can you…can you stay with me until I fall asleep?"

With a smile and a nod, Anna sat back down.

"I love you," Peyton said as she closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep.

"I love you, Peyt," Anna placed another kiss on her forehead and then whispered in her ear, "Be happy, Peyton - don't regret the past, you'll only forfeit the future,"

* * *

'To regret the past is to forfeit the future' is a Chinese Proverb 


	5. Chapter 5

**a/n:** I'm really glad that you guys are liking this story. Don't worry, everything that isn't quite clear in the last chapter will be cleared up later. A huge thanks to everyone who left a review. You guys are awesome!

Disclaimer: I do not own anything OTH related.

* * *

**Chapter 5**

Early the next morning, Peyton began to stir. When she finally opened her eyes she saw the faces of three girls hovering over her.

"Hey, sleeping beauty is waking up," Rachel said.

"Morning, girlie. How you feeling?" asked Haley.

Peyton let out an uneasy smile. She wasn't used to all this attention. "I'm good," she replied in sleepy husky voice.

"You had us worried there for a while," Ellie said.

"How long was a I asleep for?" "

Since yesterday afternoon," answered Rachel, "Lucas said you weren't feeling well and made you go to bed,"

"Oh," Peyton looked to the side of her bed. She saw a chair by her bedside but there was no Lucas sitting there. Maybe it was all just a dream. The three girls looked over to see what had Peyton's attention. They all let out a small smile.

"That boy must really care about you," Ellie commented.

Peyton looked at Ellie, "What boy?"

"Luuucas," Rachel taunted his name.

Peyton rolled her eyes.

The only serious one left in the room was Haley who then said, "You had us pretty worried, Peyton. Your fever went up to 102. Lucas was scared to leave your bedside,"

"Yeah, we had to force him to take a cold shower this morning," Rachel grinned.

Peyton threw a pillow at Rachel.

"What?" Rachel exclaimed, "He had to take a cold shower because we used the hot water…but if you want to think otherwise…"

Ellie and Haley couldn't help but laugh. Peyton on the other hand turned red before letting out a laugh herself.

"What's so funny?" Lucas asked when he entered the room.

"Oh, you know. Just some girl talk," Ellie covered for Peyton.

"Well, I'm starved," Rachel said as she stood up.

"Come on girls, let's get breakfast started," She quickly ushered Haley and Ellie out of the room with her. As she closed the door behind them, Rachel gave Peyton a wink.

"Hey," Lucas said as he took a seat on the bed.

"Hey,"

"Glad to see that you're better. How you feeling?" With the back of his hand, he gently felt her forehead. Then he slid the back of his fingers down to her cheek.

"A…umm…a lot better," she stuttered, "And thanks…"

Lucas nodded, put his hand back down on the bed, "Yeah. You just had me worried,"

She took a deep breath and looked into his eyes, "I mean for everything…last night, helping me find Ellie and her bracelet…You've really been there for me when I just needed someone,"

Lucas smiled, "I'm glad I could be there for you," A few seconds of silence passed before Lucas spoke up again. "Well, if you're feeling better, you must be starved. I should let you get dressed for breakfast,"

She reached out for his hand before he could get up, "Wait…can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, sure,"

"Do you believe in fate?"

Lucas's eyes narrowed as he thought for a moment, "I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul," he quoted Earnest Henley. Lucas shrugged his shoulders, "I believe that we are responsible for our own destinies – that if we want things to happen then we should do everything we can to make it happen,"

Peyton looked away and bit on her bottom lip. Lucas read the sudden nervousness on her face.

"Why do you ask?"

"I just had these…dreams I guess last night…"

"What were they about?" he asked curiously as he got more comfortable.

"Um…the past, regrets and the future,"

"Hmm…this sounds interesting…care to tell me what they were about?"

Peyton shifted nervously in the bed, wondering how to explain them. She was about to answer when as luck would have it, her cell phone went off. She reached over to the night side table and picked up her cell. It was her father calling. As Peyton answered the phone, Lucas politely excused himself from the room, allowing Peyton to speak privately with her father.

* * *

They had returned early to Tree Hill to spend Christmas at home. Larry's trip was cut short and he was now able to be home in time for Christmas. 

After settling Ellie in the guest bedroom, Peyton entered her room and dropped her bags at the foot of her bed. Tiredly, she plopped down on her bed. She kicked off her shoes and thought of a moment. She was this close to telling Lucas the truth about how she really felt, but she was stopped at the last second. Maybe it was fate intervening itself.

Peyton sighed, more confused then ever. It wasn't that she didn't know how she felt about Lucas; it was just that she didn't know how to tell him or when she should tell him. The situation just wasn't that easy for her. On top of that, she still didn't know where Lucas and Brooke's relationship stood. In fact neither did Brooke or Lucas.

Peyton let her feet back onto the ground as she got up. She then knelt down and reached under her bed. Blindly she felt the cold hardwood floor, until finally, she felt what she was looking for. Carefully, she pulled out a medium sized, rectangular case and placed it on her bed. She unlatched the buckles on both sides and then lifted the top lid. Leaving the painting in place, she just stared at it and began to remember the night she painted it.

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

_The white canvas disappeared as each stroke of the paint covered brush left behind colourful hues. With an intense fix on the forming picture before her, she dabbed her brus in the palate – first in the red and then second in the golden yellow. She mixed the two until the perfect shade of orange emerged. She didn't know exactly what it was, but something inside her ignited her passion and creativity. Sure she had painted murals and portraits before, but this feeling was different. This piece was different…_

_**EARLIER THAT NIGHT**_

_ "You're here early," Lucas said as he sat down beside her in the sand, facing the ocean. _

_"You too," _

_By then the sun had begun its descent, already casting hues of golden yellows and shades of oranges. Although the spent much of their summer on the beach, it was never during daylight._

_ "Yeah, when I couldn't find you at home, I figured you'd be here," _

_"I just went for a walk to clear my head…and just ended up here," she explained. "I guess it's become my second home. I can just come here and think…watch the waves roll in and feel at peace…not worry about anything else or anyone finding me because nobody knows about this place except for you and me. I feel safe here, especially with you, Lucas," _

_He lifted his long arm over her and rested it on her shoulders. He pulled her closer to him, half giving her a hug and half letting her lean on him. _

_"And it'll stay like that…even though when that sun goes down and ends our summer…I'll always be here for you, Peyt," _

_She smiled at his words. It meant the world to her and it was a moment that she would remember forever. Peyton took in every colour, every shade that the remaining sun rays left in its tracks across the darkening sky. It was one moment in her life that she wanted to capture. Peyton didn't know if they would ever have a perfect moment like that together ever again because everyone was returning home over the next few days. But right then and there it didn't matter because it was just the two of them, just as it was all summer long. And no fading sunset or summer would ever change that._

**END FLASHBACK

* * *

**

"Wow, that painting is amazing,"

The voice startled Peyton. She turned to see Ellie standing beside her, looking at the painting.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," "

It's ok," Peyton laughed, "I was just in my own little world,"

"Do you paint this?"

The teen nodded.

"I was never able to paint. Draw, yes…but I never could capture a picture like this. When did you paint this?"

At the end of summer," Peyton shrugged and closed the case back up.

"And you keep it hidden away in this case? It's art. It should be on the wall where everyone can see it,"

"It just means a lot to me, I guess. I don't want it to get ruined,"

Ellie stared at Peyton. There was something that didn't seem right, "The painting or the moment?"

"What do you mean?" "Well, what don't you want to get ruined? The painting itself, or the feeling that inspired this piece,"

Peyton looked down and away from Ellie. Was she really that transparent?

"Something tells me that you keep it hidden because you're hiding something,"

When Peyton didn't answer again, Ellie got the hint. She was right about something and although she didn't know Peyton all that long, it wasn't hard to figure out that Peyton didn't like to be pushed. "I just came up to borrow a pair of scissors," Ellie picked up a pair of scissors off the desk, " I have a couple of things to wrap, but you want to talk about it, I'm here," she said before she left the room.

* * *

Ellie answered the soft knock on her door. She smiled warmly, knowing that it was Peyton. 

Peyton finally realized that she needed someone to talk to now. The long debates in her head were beginning to drive her insane. "Um…I made some tea…do you want to join me?" asked Peyton.

"Sure, I'd love to,"

* * *

Two cups of tea later, Ellie was now up to date with the history of the PLB triangle. 

"It's just that, I don't really have anyone to talk to about it…" Peyton began "I mean can't really go to Brooke about this, Haley is her roommate and I don't want to put her in the middle of all this, Nathan has enough problems of his own, Rachel…well it's no secret that she's all for Lucas and I getting together…and Lucas…well, I'd usually go to him, but I can't either,"

Ellie nodded, understanding. Although she was Peyton's last resort, albeit unintentionally, she was glad that Peyton had opened up to her. "Well, I can certainly see why you're so confused. It sounds to me that its already been decided that you're going to tell Lucas how you feel. And I think it's the right decision. But it also sounds like you don't know what to do about Brooke,"

Peyton nodded.

"You do know that things between you two may never be the same, right?"

"To be honest, I don't think things have been the same since Lucas and I had our…whatever it was…I just don't want to hurt her like that again," "No matter what you do, Peyton…someone will get hurt. But you don't have any control over that. Just remember that no matter who you tell first, Brooke is going to find out. So maybe you should tell her first,"

* * *

**A/N:** I know it seems a bit boring, but a bit repetitive, but I feel like Peyton is confused - she wants to tell Lucas but she doesn't want to hurt Brooke AND she doesn't want to get hurt herself because she doesn't really know how Lucas feels anyways. Also I feel like Peyton would go to Brooke first and try to make things right this time...let me know what you think.  



	6. Chapter 6

Sorry I couldn't get this update up sooner, but I came down with a nasty cold and then had some internet problems. I think I could have done better with this chapter, but it got my main points across and I don't really want to wait another day to post. So enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 6**

With both her hands resting her in black leather jacket, Peyton waited nervously for the door to open. She didn't have anything planned to say – rehearsed speeches weren't her style. But now she was wishing it was because she had no idea what she was going to say to Brooke.

Peyton took in one last deep breath as she heard the door unlock and then watched it swing open, "It's about time, Mouth," Brooke announced who was also expecting Mouth McFadden. When she actually saw who it was, her face grew in surprise.

Peyton let out a smirk "Hey,"

Brooke covered her surprise face with a smile, "Peyton. You're back,"

"You don't look too happy, Davis," joked Peyton.

"No…I am. It's just…" Brooke felt uneasy but didn't want to let is show, "Come here," she pulled Peyton into a hug. "Merry Christmas,"

"Merry Christmas," Peyton let go of Brooke, "My dad is coming home, so we're going to spend Christmas in Tree Hill,"

"Oh…well that's good…cause I need all the help I can get with _Clothes Over Bro's_," the brunette suddenly held up a t-shirt with her company's logo on it.

"Hmm…for starters, the apostrophe has got to go,"

"Ugh, what are you, Tutor Girl?" Brooke walked back into the house, letting Peyton come in, "She said the same thing, but this is my company and the apostrophe stays,"

"Alright," Peyton shrugged, not really caring.

Peyton took a seat at the counter of the kitchen island. Brooke was on the other side of the counter, pulling printed t-shirts from a box.

"Well, I thought I'd come over to bring you your Christmas gift," Peyton held out a wrapped box for her friend.

"Oh, Peyton," Brooke said with a regretful expression on her face, "Thank you…but with the clothing line…I actually didn't have time to go Christmas shopping,"

"It's ok," laughed Peyton, "It's cool…I just wanted to give it to you before um…things get busy with um, the holiday and stuff,"

Brooke smiled as she happily took the package. She walked across the living room and placed in under the tree with the other gifts that had been wrapped by Haley.

"There's one more thing…" Peyton said as she stood up from her stool.

Brooke looked up from the tree and over at Peyton. "More presents for moi?"

"Um…no, actually, Brooke, I was hoping we could talk,"

"Yeah, of course. What's up?"

"Well…" she hesitated.

Brooke recognized the look in her face. "Let me guess…it's about Lucas,"

Peyton nodded, "How'd you guess?"

"Let's just say, I'm getting better at reading people's faces now,"

"Oh,"

"Look, I don't know what happened up at the cottage or what he said to you but I don't want to talk to him right now," she said sadly, "So if he asked you to talk to me…"

"Actually, he didn't," Peyton interrupted, "Actually I don't even know if you guys are back together or not…"

"We're not…I haven't heard from him since we left,"

Peyton bit her lip. A part of her was happy to hear the news but other part of her saw the hurt Brooke's eyes. Peyton looked down at the ground. If she was going to tell Brooke, there was no way she could do it while looking directly at her.

"Look, I came over to talk to you on my own…and I don't really know how to say it, but there's something I need to tell you,"

A sudden feeling of jealousy overcame Brooke. She began to wonder if something had happened while they were away. She folded her arms across her chest and waited for Peyton to explain.

"Last year, you asked me how I felt about Luke," Peyton slowly began, "and I never really gave you a straight answer... maybe because I didn't really know the answer.,or maybe because I was scared but the truth is, I was in love with him…and I don't know… at the cottage …"

"You slept with him?"

"What? No!" Peyton immediately denied, "Brooke…what I'm trying to say is that…I realized that I'm still in love with Lucas. My feelings, they never went away. He doesn't know it yet, but…I'm going to tell him,"

Brooke opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Although she wasn't surprised about Peyton's feelings, she was surprised at her own confusion.

"Wh…what if I asked you not to tell him?"

Peyton looked down. In a soft voice, "I can't do that, Brooke. Not any more,"

"So our friendship means nothing to you?"

"Brooke, it means everything to me…"

"Then don't do this Peyton. He's the only guy who has ever made me happy…and I'm not ready to give that up yet," Brooke choked out.

"I'm sorry, Brooke. I really really am," Peyton wiped her eyes as her lips quivered, "If I just loved him then maybe things would be different. But I don't just love him...I'm still in love with him,"

A soft thud came from the doorway. Both Brooke and Peyton looked up to see a bouquet of flowers on the floor. A bouquet of flowers that was once held by Lucas Scott. Lucas was standing at the doorway with a surprised look in his eyes.

A sudden feeling of embarrassment came over Peyton. She hadn't expected for Lucas to find out like this. She didn't know what to do next so she only did what was natural to her; she ran out of the apartment, brushing right past Lucas.

Still in shock himself, it took Lucas a moment to compose himself. He then turned around and started after Peyton.

"Wait, Lucas," Brooke called out.

Lucas stopped at the doorway and looked at Brooke.

"We were…she was talking about Jake,"

The look of hope slipped from his eyes. His head lowered and his pursed his lips together in disappointment. A soft bitter laugh escaped him as he shook his head.

"Lucas, I'm sorry,"

He nodded and held out his hand, asking Brooke not to come closer. With his hand on the door, he gently closed it behind him. His heart had just been on an emotional rollercoaster that lasted only a few seconds but it was enough for him wanting to be alone.

Lucas leaned on the railing and looked out over the parking lot below. From above, he watched Peyton drive quickly out of the parking lot.

* * *

The events that night replayed through her head over and over. She couldn't believe how easily the words flew right out of her mouth.

"Now you've really done it," her conscience suddenly said.

"I didn't mean it," Brooke said through spilt tears, "but it's not fair…it's not fair that Lucas is only pretending to love me…it's not fair that I can't have someone care about me like that,"

Brooke's conscience, who was dressed in a tight and revealing red outfit sat down beside Brooke in her bed. It still weirded Brooke out that her conscience looked nothing like herself at all. In fact it looked exactly like how Rachel looked dressed up as Pamela Anderson. "I know it's hard," she sighed, "But you know how this will all end up in the future if you stay with Lucas,"

"But what if I change? What if I make Lucas fall in love with me? What if we move out of Tree Hill?" Brooke wondered.

"What if Lucas Scott never met Peyton Sawyer?" she mocked, "You know it wouldn't matter…cause they'd end up meeting at some point in their lives…look the point is, no matter what you do, in the end, it will always be Peyton and Lucas, not Brooke and Lucas happily ever after,"

Brooke couldn't believe how mean and how harsh her conscience was, but being Brooke Davis, she wasn't going to give up the fight, even if she was battling herself, "But I can't just turn off my feelings…besides how do we know he doesn't really love me…I mean he came over to see me, not Peyton…and he came to bring me flowers, not Peyton,"

"And then what happened when he saw Peyton? What happened when he heard what Peyton said?" her conscience reminded her.

Fresh tears began to fill her eyes.

"Exactly how did Lucas look when you **_lied_** to him and said that Peyton was talking about Jake? Did you see his face? How sad he looked?"

"Why are you doing all this? Aren't you supposed to be on my side?"

"I am," she replied as she flipped her faux blonde hair, "I'm trying to save ourselves from an unhappy future,"

"I can change it," Brooke said defiantly.

"Brooke really…I mean we're good, but we're not that good," she laughed. "I mean we dated the guy twice and he still goes back to her…he still loves her…Besides exactly what are you going to say when Lucas finds out that you lied to him? Do you really think we still have a chance after what you did? And what about Peyton?"

Her conscience stood up, "Peyton is supposed to be our best friend Brooke…or did we just say that to get back at her? Because when was the last time we were ever really there for her?"

Brooke thought for a moment, trying to remember the last time she and Peyton seriously talked. Even before the triangle evolved, they never really had a real conversation…at least not since high school started.

"But do you want to know what my real question is?" The conscience plopped herself back down on the bed beside Brooke. She looked at Brooke and then handed her a stack of photos of random guys Brooke had kissed over the summer, "Do we really love Lucas or do we just want to keep them apart?"


	7. Chapter 7

**  
Disclaimer:** I own nothing OTH related

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**  
**

**Chapter 7**

"So let me get this straight," Rachel said as she and Peyton made their way up to the second floor of the Sawyer's residence, "You finally admitted that you were still in love with him and he heard you?"

"Mmm," Peyton finished taking sip from her iced coffee, "Don't forget that my face turned beet red before my scrawny chicken legs ran straight for the door,"

"And you haven't heard from him since last night?"

Peyton shook her head no as they reached the top of the stairs, "Guess I lost him and Brooke,"

Rachel put her arm around Peyton, offering support, "Guess one good thing did come out of all this," she smirked.

Peyton responded with a smile and bumped Rachel with her hip.

"What?" Rachel exclaimed, "I meant that you get to spend more time with me,"

"Riiight," Peyton said with a laugh.

The two friends were too busy laughing to notice that somebody was already in Peyton's room. Peyton was the first to notice an awkward feeling in the room and immediately stopped laughing when she looked up. Wondering why Peyton's face suddenly turned serious, Rachel looked up to see Brooke standing across the room.

"Wow…I didn't think you could replace a best friend so easily," It was a cold remark but Brooke never meant it that way. She was always a girl who spoke her mind and many times she did so without thinking. It had actually hurt her to see Peyton hanging out with other friends, especially when Brooke never liked them.

"Well, considering the best friend is you…"

"Rach…" Peyton cut the red head off from finishing her sentence. The last thing Peyton wanted was another fight, especially between two people who already hated each other. "Brooke, what are you doing here?"

"I came by to give you your Christmas present,"

"Aww…how sweet," Rachel commented which only garnered a look from Peyton.

Peyton then looked at the foot of her bed where there was a medium sized green gift bag tied with a red bow on top. "Thanks,"

"And I was," Brooke continued softly, "hoping that we could talk…alone,"

Knowing that Peyton wanted to work things out with Brooke, Rachel reluctantly spoke up, "I'll be downstairs if you need me, Peyton,"

The two former best friends were left alone in Peyton's bedroom. The same bedroom where they had sleepovers; make-up sessions; pretend fashion shows; and the same room where they shared countless number of childhood memories together – memories that were impossible to forget.

"Remember we used to sit in your rooms for hours... I'd paint my nails and you'd paint something on your wall...or we'd just lie on your bed listening to the new record you bought at the store...or the times we'd hide in your closet there and tell each other our deepest darkest secrets?"

"Yeah," Peyton nodded sadly, "That was a long time ago,"

"We shared a lot of good times, P. Sawyer. You are my best friend in the whole wide world and I don't want to lose you. I know I haven't actually been there for you lately but you have to understand, this has been hard for me,"

"What do you mean?"

"Ever since you and Lucas…when Lucas and I were…" Brooke choked out.

Peyton bit her quivering lip.

"It's funny, you know…but I have to admit that I understand why you couldn't walk away from him…because I actually saw what you saw in Lucas…he was sweet, kind and caring…and I fell for him too," Brooke held on to her tears for as long as she could, "Maybe Lucas and I aren't meant to be…maybe I went after him for all the wrong reasons…but all that doesn't matter because I was with him. Peyton, do you know how much it hurt that you could sneak behind my back…your own best friend,"

"Brooke, you know I'm sorry…"

"I know…I know you are but he was the first guy to treat me right…to respect me…and then you took it all away from me. And maybe that's why I never forgave you," she cried out.

Peyton blinked back her tears and she looked at Brooke in shock. For the first time, Brooke finally let out her feelings. Peyton knew that things between them weren't exactly the same and now she knew exactly why. Her head hung low as she heard Brooke crying. It tore her apart inside as she learned exactly how Brooke was feeling. Although Peyton knew that she had hurt her best friend, she just didn't know that Brooke was still hurting just as much as she was.

"Guess we're both good at keeping things in," Brooke shrugged and wiped her eyes, "I guess I was stupid enough to think that if I pretended none of this happened, things would go back to normal and that I'd be happy with Lucas…but I realized that it can't…not when we're all lying to ourselves and to each other,"

She still didn't know what to say. Brooke was right. They could never be really happy or friends for that matter if all they did was lie about their feelings.

"But you already knew that," Brooke calmed her voice down, "So…I guess it's my turn to tell the truth…"

Without another word, the brunette picked up the gift back and held it out for Peyton. After some hesitation, Peyton reached for the bag and carefully emptied the contents onto her bed. Out fell an empty bottle of paint remover, a used brush, putty knife and a purple stained rag. Peyton cocked an eyebrow as she stared at her strange Christmas gift.

Still in silence, Brooke then walked over to the purple painted double closet doors. After looking back to make sure that Peyton was watching, she opened the door and stepped aside.

The inside part of the doors had been stripped down to it's wood. The purple paint was gone, as was the 'list'. All of the names of the boys on Brooke's list were gone. The door that held Peyton's list showed nothing but the brown pine.

"I know you don't need my permission or anything…it's just that truthfully, I'm holding on to something that I know will never happen. He's not in love with me Peyton,"

"Brooke…"

"No, it's the truth. And it's time that I let things be right for once. I've screwed up, Peyton and I want you to know how sorry I am and that I'd give anything to start over,"

Peyton reached out for her friend and hugged her, "You have nothing to be sorry for,"

"Yeah, I do," Brooke pulled back, "after you ran out yesterday…Lucas had no idea you were talking about him…so I…I told him you were talking about Jake,"

Peyton's eyes grew wide in surprise. Her breath grew short and it quickened as her mind raced. Just when things had just been patched up with Brooke, another obstacle was thrown in their way. But this time it was clear for Peyton. The obstacle was Brooke – and in hindsight, it always was.

"I'm sorry, Peyton," repented Brooke, "it just slipped and…"

"I think you should go," Peyton coldly said. She turned her back on Brooke. It had just been too much for her.

At the doorway, Brooke looked back one last time at her once childhood friends with tears welling in her eyes. The lies between them were finally out in the open and unfortunately it had only made things worse. But Brooke knew that it would only be a matter of time when Peyton would find a way to forgive her because they were best friends – and best friends always found a way to forgive each other. It had taken Brooke a year to finally forgive Peyton. Brooke only hoped that it wouldn't take that long.

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**A/N:** I never really understood how Brooke forgave Peyton so quickly after finding out she and Lucas had a semi-fling...I guess this chapter answers it. Although I don't like the fact that Brooke is never around for Peyton, I can see that maybe because it's because Brooke never really forgave Peyton. But now I'm thinking where was Brooke back when she was dating Nathan or during the anniversary of Anna's death...k, I"m going to stop thinking about it now. 

Anyways, hope you guys like this one. And as always, thanks for reading and for reviewing!


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: **It's about time that I finished this chapter! It took longer to write then I anticipated but it's done. Thanks to everyone who's been reading and reviewing. I hope you haven't forgotten about it!

**Disclimer: **I don't own anything OTH related...there are a few quotes/ideas from the show, I don't claim those either...I'm just borrowing :)

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**Chapter 8**

Ten years had past since Ellie Harp, Peyton's biological mother, had passed on. Although she had lost the battle with cancer, Ellie was the one who gained the most. She was no longer alone and she didn't die alone. In fact, on May 16, 2006, surrounded by her new friends from Tree Hill, Ellie took her final breath as Peyton held her hand. Although they never exactly had a typical mother-daughter relationship, due to the fact that they never had enough time to get to that level, they still cared about each other as if they were.

Everything that Ellie had owned, including the chalet, were all left to Peyton. It meant a lot to Peyton and she never wanted to forget Ellie either. So as part remembrance and part tradition, Peyton threw a Christmas gathering for all of her family and friends.

The chalet was decorated with carefully hung lights. A large Christmas tree, with dozens of wrapped presents sitting underneath, stood tall in front of the large front window. The rest of the room was filled with happy and conversing adults with playing children scattered throughout.

Standing alone in front of the fire place, Peyton sipped on her red wine. She smiled as she looked around the bright and joyful room. Everyone Peyton loved and cared about was in that room. Her father was sitting comfortably on the couch, proudly cradling his first, two-month-old grandson in his arms. A month after Aiden was born, Larry retired from the drudging industry. The news had surprised Peyton at first since she thought her father would never give up the sea life. But after missing the birth of his first grandson, because he was out at sea, Larry swore that he would never miss another important event of his daughter's and grandson's life.

Behind the couch, where Larry was sitting next to Keith and Karen, Peyton saw Skillz and Mouth talking to Rachel and Brooke.

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

_Peyton sat on her bed, staring at the doors while she processed what had just happened. Like the names on the on the closet door, her friendship with Brooke was no more. All that was left was the bare wood and its grains; the purple paint had been stripped away; and the names that were boldly written in a silver Sharpie were also gone on both of the closet doors._

_A gentle hand reaching for Peyton's shoulder snapped her out of her daze. _

"_Hey," Rachel gave Peyton a warm smile, "I saw Brooke running out the door crying. I take things didn't go over too well,"_

_Peyton shook her head, unable to speak. _

"_Look you two have been best friends for like what," Rachel guessed as she sat down beside Peyton, "ten years? All of this will be nothing but a little fight in a few days,"_

"_She told Lucas that I was still in love with Jake," her voice was quiet but it explained the way she was feeling. _

"_She what?" Rachel exclaimed in shock. _

_Suddenly, Rachel stood up and reached for Peyton's hand, "Come on,"_

"_No, I can't see her right now," Peyton resisted. _

"_Good. Neither can I…I mean I could, but I'm far too young and pretty for jail," Rachel smirked as she grabbed Peyton's hand._

"_Then where are we going?"_

"_We're going to Lucas's…we're going to set that boy straight","_

_Peyton withdrew her hand and shook her head, "No. I can't,"_

_The red head sighed, "Peyton, all this time you've wanted to tell him how you feel. You said you couldn't until you talked to Brooke… and now you have. So what's stopping you now?"_

"_Everything is just messed up again…on top of that, look at me. I'm an emotional wreck," Ending her friendship with Brooke was hard on Peyton. The way she was feeling couldn't be ignored and she knew gaining a boyfriend wouldn't make it go away either, not even if the boy was Lucas. "Besides, I wouldn't know what to say,"_

_Rachel sat down beside her friend and offered Peyton some encouraging words, "Yes you do, Peyton. Look, Brooke came over and told you the truth. And as much as it probably killed her, she didn't have to do that. Maybe she didn't say it aloud, but I think she's trying to make things right," Rachel tilted her head and looked at her friend, "Look, forget about Brooke for a minute… cause we all know that your blind and way too generous heart will find a way forgive her," she added sarcastically. "But Brooke's not standing in your way now…It's you,"_

_For a few moments, Peyton thought about what Rachel had just said. Then with a tilt of the head, Peyton replied, "Wait, did Rachel Gattina just defend Brooke Davis?"_

"_You know, I don't really hate Brooke," Rachel admitted, "It's just fun giving her a run for her money AND making her life a living hell. But hey, you're not changing the subject, missy," _

_Rachel leapt to her feet and headed towards the closet, "Come on, hit the showers, while I find you something to wear,"_

**END FLASHBACK

* * *

**

Peyton waved at Brooke and Rachel, her two friends, across the room. The curly blonde was thankful for having Rachel in her life. Rachel was always the one who pushed Peyton to do the right things and not just to dwell on the negative consequences. She was a great friend.

Brooke Davis was also a great friend. Although it had taken the two former best friends a long time to get back on track, they found a way to forgive each other, just like all best friends did. It had been hard for them to rebuild that trust they had lost but both of them were willing to mend their friendship. The encouragement from both Lucas and Rachel helped a great deal as well.

Although Peyton never dared to admit it to either of them, Peyton always saw a lot of Brooke in Rachel. Both girls always knew what they wanted and did almost anything to get it. The two were more similar than they wanted to admit, which was probably why they never really got along in high school. The only difference between the two was that Rachel also had a little bit of Peyton in her as well.

The screams of Jacob and Mackenzie Scott startled Peyton for a second. She turned in time to see Mackenzie chasing her older brother around their parents, Nathan and Haley. Trying to keep herself from laughing, Haley tried to get her children to behave while juggling and squirming Tyler in her arms. Nathan, on the other hand, stood patiently, waiting to make his move. With a childish grin on his face, Nathan started chasing after his daughter. Tyler, the toddler, laughed hysterically as he watched his father and siblings run circles around Haley. Poor, Haley, Peyton thought. She didn't know how her friend could raise three little ones and one big kid all at once.

Across the room, in front of the tree, Peyton saw Jake and Lucas. She curiously watched on as a pregnant brunette approached the two chatting friends. The woman greeted Lucas with a warm hug. With an equally warm reception, Lucas returned the hug and placed a gentlemanly kiss on her cheek.

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

_It was a half an hour before closing and Lucas Scott found himself alone in the café. He hadn't had a customer since the dinner rush ended two hours earlier. Usually it didn't bother him so much because it meant that he could spend the rest of the night reading. But tonight, was different - he didn't particularly enjoy the book he was reading. And unfortunately for him, his pet peeve was not finishing a book once it had been started – which meant that he had to endure the drab fictional world of the book for a little bit longer. _

_He eagerly looked up and welcomed the distraction when he heard the front door open. His automatic smile, that greeted customers, slipped into a more pleasant and genuine smile, as it did every time he saw her. _

"_Hey," she said softly as the door closed behind her._

"_Hey," he huskily greeted. "Your curls…they're back,"_

"_Yeah," her fingers gently touched the ends of curls. Although they were hard to maintain, Peyton had missed them and was glad that Rachel insisted that she go back to her natural roots. _

_Lucas put his book down on the counter and cleared his throat. Although he felt his heart skip a beat as he watched her walk towards him, Lucas ignored the feeling. If Jake was the guy she wanted to be with then the only thing he could do was to continue being the friend that she needed him to be. If that was the only way he could be in her life, then so be it, at least she was in his life. _

"_So, how's it going?" questioned Lucas._

"_Good," she took a seat on the stool in front of him. Peyton nervously licked her lips, trying to find something to say. The book on the counter caught her wandering eyes._

"_Good book?" she asked, hoping that some sort of chit chat would calm her down a bit. _

_Lucas chuckled and shook his head, "Probably the worst book I've read in a long time,"_

"_Oh," was all that she could muster. Her mind raced as fast as her beating heart as it searched for the right way to start. Then suddenly her eyes lit up, "You know, I read a book last night," _

"_Really?" Lucas placed his hands on the counter and leaned in clearly interested. _

""_Yeah…well actually, you see, it's a sequel,"_

"_A sequel?" his forehead wrinkled. _

"_Yeah, it's about the same girl and boy who have this weird vibe thing and share this incredibly messed up history together… do you remember?"_

_Lucas curiously looked at Peyton, "Yeah, I think I do,"_

"_Well, as usual, there's all this drama going on between the two – like every time they try to explore this vibe, something stops them…or they have this impeccably bad timing," she laughed nervously, "Anyways, for a long while they lose touch…and to the girl… it seems like forever. Until this one amazing summer they find their way back to each other…" _

_She looked up at him and saw that she had him captivated. As she looked him in the eye, Peyton continued, "The thing is, all along in her heart, she wished that there was something more…she just didn't want to admit it…I don't know, maybe she didn't want to hurt her best friend again…or maybe it was because she was too scared,"_

_Lucas remained quiet, listening to every word she was saying._

"_But after one bizarre night, the girl finally realizes just how important this boy is to her…and not just as friend. She realizes that she's in love with him…that she always has been and she doesn't want to hide it anymore,"_

_Lucas looked down at the counter then took a step back. It had caught him off guard. Hearing her story was the last thing he had expected that night. After hearing from Brooke that Peyton was still in love with Jake, Lucas couldn't help be question Peyton's intentions. He rubbed his brow as he processed it all. He let out a deep breath as Peyton slowly stood up. _

_She could tell that it was a lot to take in and the fact that she couldn't read what he was thinking or feeling, scared her even more. Peyton took a step back. His long hesitation to answer didn't comfort her at all. She couldn't help but think that he was taking his time trying to find a way to let her down gently_

_From the corner of his eye, he saw Peyton step back. If there was one thing that Lucas was sure of, it was that he couldn't let her out that door. _

"_Wait," he said. He quickly walked to the end of the counter. His pace slowed as he rounded the corner and started towards her. With small steps his eyes locked on her surprised, but scared eyes. "What happens next to this boy and girl? I mean what if there's someone else,"_

_Peyton shook her head, "There isn't anyone else, at least for the girl there isn't. She's just scared to find out what the boy is thinking …that's as far as I got,"_

_Now standing in front of her, Lucas studied her carefully. His protected heart was on the line and he just had to be sure. In a whispering voice Lucas said, "I think…the boy in your story…feels the same way too…"_

_A feeling of excitement and happiness rushed through her veins. For once in her life she could feel things going her way. She was finally going to get the chance to be happy. It was a feeling she never felt before and she was now willing to fight for it._

"_But, he's just as scared," Lucas looked down and then admitted, "I'm scared, Peyton. I want to take that next step with you believe me, I do…but I don't want to lose you either,"_

"_You won't" she insisted. "Lucas, before, I didn't know what I wanted but I do now. You have always been there for me and you'd do anything for me – no questions asked. And I want to do the same for you. Lucas, I want to be that girl for you,"_

"_What about Jake? What will happen if he comes back?"_

_Peyton smiled before closing the gap between herself and boy she was in love with. "Then he comes back. And it'd be awesome if he did with Jenny in his arms," The fingers of her hand gently touched the side of his cheek. "Jake's a great guy. Okay? But, he's not you,"_

**END FLASHBACK

* * *

**

Peyton smiled as she then saw Lauren kiss Jake on the lips before standing close to him. As they continued to talk to Lucas, Jake smiled at his glowing wife and tucked a piece of her brown hair behind her ear. Peyton was happy for Jake and Jenny; Lauren loved Jake and more importantly, loved Jenny just as much.

If someone had told her that she'd have it all – a wonderful, caring husband, a beautiful son and a house with the ever so cliché white picket fence – when she was in high school, she would have laughed in their face and escorted them to an insane asylum herself. But who could have blamed the old Peyton Sawyer? After all, she had been through a lot more grief and heartache then the average teenage girl. Throughout most of her life she grew up and went through each hardship alone. A faux tough exterior she had built around herself let her do that.

Those walls that she built didn't just hide her. For a long time they were the only things that she could lean on. But there was one person that saw through it – saw how tired she was and how lonely she really was. Little by little he chipped away at the wall she had always leaned on and let her lean on him instead. Brick by brick he erased those nagging doubts from her mind and replaced them with hope and love. The teenage boy that stole her heart and freed her doubting mind became her rock. That teenage boy also grew into the man that became her husband.

"Hey," Lucas whispered into her ear as he came up behind her, "It's almost time to feed Aiden,"

With a smile, he stepped aside and put his arm around Peyton's shoulders. They both looked over at their son who was being held by his smiling grandfather. Lucas started to walk towards them but Peyton remained frozen in place. Confused, Lucas looked back at his wife.

Her lips curled happily when she noticed two figures standing just behind Larry. It was Anna and Ellie. Standing side by side, they exchanged smiles as they watched over the sleeping baby like two guardian angels. Anna's eyes then fell onto to her husband. Larry looked up to his right, a little startled, as he felt something touch his shoulder. Then he let out a little smile.

"Peyt? What is it?" Lucas asked.

She shook her head and she grinned at him, "Nothing…" Peyton pulled Lucas back towards her, "Let's let them spend more time together,"

Lucas didn't argue as Peyton wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Merry Christmas," she said.

His arms pulled her body closer to his and held her tight, "Merry Christmas,"

They shared a gentle kiss before resting their foreheads on each other. She closed her eyes and smiled blissfully

"What are you thinking about now?" he wondered.

"Just how one little decision changed our future for the better," she said quietly.

He always adored the fact that his wife had deep thoughts and had a different perspective on life, but he still wondered what she meant by that. Still in his arms, Peyton opened her eyes and met his.

"I love you so much," she declared

Lucas stopped trying to figure out what she meant. It didn't matter. All that mattered was how in love they both were and that they had their whole lives to live together and with their son. It had taken them a while to get to where they were now, but it was well worth it. She was worth it.

"I love you too,"

* * *

A/N: Well, sadly this concludes this story. I know I didn't explain exactly how Peyton and Brooke became friends again, but it just would have been too long and complicated to explain…I have, however, been playing with the idea of writing a sequel to this that will explain what happened from the night in the café to where they are now. But it may take a while to put together since school is starting to take over my life again. Anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed the story. 


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